Teams You've Played For:

How did you get involved with roller derby?: I put some skates on at a party and with some moderate coaxing from Ana Maul E, I showed up for try-outs the next year.

How did you choose your derby name?: My name is a play on the TV show Walker, Texas Ranger.. just repping my home state

Pre-Derby Sports Background: None, I don't like to get sweaty or dirty. Plus I cry when I lose.

Off Skates Workouts: Chasing my kid and my dog, ab glide, turbo fire at about 50% for about 20 min at a time, whatever fresh hell Busty puts us through in off-skates training.

Best Fresh Meat Moment: Can I have two? FINALLY making time on my 27 in 5. and getting Lead Jammer in a bout!

Favorite Derby Moment: I love every moment that involves derby.

Likes: eating, make-up, sparkly things, drag queens, wine, combos, monster rehab, Netflix binging...skating is okay too..

Dislikes: people who don't wash their derby gear or wear deodorant, when people say "no offense, but" right before they say the most obnoxious thing ever, rudeness, mushrooms, hipsters, oh and BULLIES.

Derby Heroes: Not going to say, I don't want to get made fun of.

Pre-Bout Ritual: Step 1. Eat copious amounts of combos and oatmeal creme pies. Step 2. Monster Rehab Step. 3. Apply Drag Queen make-up. Step 4. Repeatedly say things like "omg omg omg" and "I'm scared". Step 5. Squeeze into my teeny jersey. Step 6. More than likely get bullied. By my own team.

Derby Wife/Spouse: Can I have more than one?